Subject: Re: Part 3
Our Most Dear Nina,
I am most thankful
that GOD allowed man to develope the computer to the point that he has because if he had not it is quite clear to me that the world would have suffered a terrible great loss if you had not had one on that dreadful night that you were on those antidepressants and were about to take that terrible plunge which would have made satan most happy as he would not have to battle with you for the lost souls that you have lead back to the path that leads to the hill where CHRIST died on the cross to pay for our sins still stands as it has stood for almost 2000 years and the blood shed then to wash away our sins is just as fresh and pure today as it was then. It will wash the sins from ANYONE. They just have to ask GOD to forgive their sins and place their trust and faith in him. The one time in my life that I thought I needed some help to get through a bad time the Doctor I was using at the time give me a bottle full and the first one I took done me the same way that you said yours done you I soon decided that there was some thing wrong and never took another one of them. That is when I got real serious with dealing with my high stress and tension on my own as I told you about back of this and has worked ever since without the drugs. Have you had anytime to think about the Birthday cake For Your Son Eric this April? As the BIBLE says we come from the dust of the earth and we return to the the earth as dust. In Eric's case his ashes were returned to the earth at your beautful Freesoul Rock. In doing so the nutrients returned to the soil of the earth which in turn fed all of the plants around in order for them to put forth the fruit which all of GODS creatures partake of to maintain life in abundance. Now if This is so why would a birthday party not be in order as ERIC would be in attendence as all of GODS little creatures along with God and they would all be so happy that you could be with them and be happy also they would sing you many beautiful songs. The birds are one of the most beautiful singers GOD ever created. If by chance he had not created the birds it would be a very sad place to be. If a person is feeling sad all they need to do is step out side and if they will listen to the songs of the music of God coming from the beautiful birds they should be cheered up in just minutes. The little Wrens have brought me music each morning this week at 6:30AM as I leave for work. Talk about service that brings a smile to an old man they do. I bet they would also bring a smile to your face if you took them a cake to your Freesoul Rock. Why don't we try and see.    I enjoy writing to you My most SPECIAL Friend but it is getting late so I will close until in the morning.
With Our Love and HUGS, ~ Jim and Family


Dear Jim; Really busy day today! Our church is having its' annual AGAPE dinner - a wonderful fun event! Brandi will be attending for the first time this year. She has always watched me dress up and go out to it - and she is SOOOooo excited that this time I am taking her and her mother (and even Peach) with me! Peach has been before... to the best one I ever attended - It was in 1992, Roger, Eric, Peach and I all went and left the girls with Jeanne... (At that time I had two of Brandis' sisters living here too)
----> if you had not had one (computer)on that dreadful night
^And a very special thing about all of this is 
that it was Eric for whom I first bought a computer in 1991.... AND - it was Eric hinself, who helped me to begin to use one in 1993, and it was Eric who taught me to chat online in 1995. He prepared a path for me to be safe upon when he would no longer be with me....
----> anytime to think about the Birthday cake
^Yes, Jim. And it is an excellent idea
which I knew that same day that I received it from you - that I would do it this year and perhaps, for always.... and then perhaps after I too am scattered there - some of my family may even want to keep such a memorial tradition... Our family tradition for toddlers is to have Gingerbread for their first years - (with whipped cream, of course) so that they can just dig in and eat it with their own hands and early ~silverware skills~.... Finger-lickin-good does not only apply to CHICKEN here! *giggle* And so it will be gingerbread! And we are going to do it... and I was going to thank you for suggesting it to me even before this inquiry! Believe me... For I am such a ~Romantic~ and it will be very good for me to begin such a tradition in his honor... and indeed - there are many little critters and birds there who will also appreciate that you suggested it to me! *GRIN*
----> if they will listen to the songs of the music of God coming from the beautiful birds they should be cheered up in just minutes.
^As you will see when you are here -
our little Shangrilah here is so filled with such music. All who come here find it awesomely so. I guess that the many fountains, trees and shrubs crowded here around the house here on our little half acre - have a lot to do with that - as well as my own personal feeling that God has blessed me especially well in their being happy to reside with and serenade us here! *RVBG!* Have to begin curling Brandis' hair for today! We are so excited about this evening and our ~first timers (Brandi and her mother) coming along! Gotta go now.... Love and hugs for {{{{{{{Jim, Barbara and Kayla)))))))
From your GYPSY, (Nina) and Miss Brandi

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Subject: Praise to God for all of you
All Praise be to God for all of you, Christian brothers and sister. There is no distance in the spirit, in praise, in grace, in love. Bless you all and all that concerns you. Hadasena Negesti de Eritrea


Hello Connie; Thank you for writing and letting me know you were here and enjoyed the visit. I appreciate your sharing your thoughts/feelings with me. I hope that you will visit again. Yours because I'm His, ~ Nina

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dcac@pop.uwin.com
Dear Nina, I enjoyed your homepage tonight, and was touched by by how God has worked in your life. God's Grace is sufficient. Isn't he good. Your poetry gives him glory. A friend in Christ.

Hello; You didn't leave your name, but you did leave your spirit and affirmation for me - Thank you. I so appreciate that. Yours because I'm His, ~ Nina

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Those of you who follow our communications here - know of June, and her brain surgeries - and she is now recovering and has great pain and challenges to gain back the ground lost to the surgical proceedures. It is remarkable that she can write even this well- but just look at the beauty of her spirit reaching out from the midst of all she faces moment to moment. She is a beautiful, bright and brilliantly shining star! Should any of you feel led to do so <and I plead that you will> - she would very-much appreciate some meaningful, caring communication from any of you.... God bless you and through you, I pray!
Please, This is not a chain letter type of thing - or someone far away and impersonal, she is right here and a few minutes here at the keyboard would brighten and encourage her day so much!

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"June A. Johnson" junebug@icanect.net
Hello Dear Nina, Today is a worse than usual day. Your email with all that wonderful music in files provided a prarchute! Althou I didn't wake up until 2 pm - well, I didn't feel wonderful, - or not so hot - or even as good as terrible! But Nina, your jewel piece of email nestled me into a perfect, soft and uplifting safetynesst. Really needed more than I can say. Jesus had me by my hand - as always, but my arm was stretching a bit about then! I wrote a letter - overdue - ealier to someome - daughter - but oddly while writing, the letter was for you as much as for her! You are probl one of few persons on each who could understand this and take no hurt or slight from it! Perhaps you helped me write that letter! She is in rough time (99 out of 100%) now - without your strong help the letter may not have been possible! The last 4 - 5 - 6 days have been worse yet. just stupid physical stuff - just stupid pain. But Nina, from this, my soul is being reinforced with strength - even tho Jesus and His Angels always hold so tightly to my being, even they know when a 'special touch' could help! You have been my special touch for several days now and to not let you know this would be worse than terrible.! Monday, no matter whqt, I will be going to my Dr. of Internal Med (had to cancel 2 weeks in row) - and time being a gift in sense it has helped me see some things a bit clearer now. Oh no, Nina! Nothing to worry about - perhaps the 'list of things to do for Lord' is longer than I could have guessed! hmmmmmmm good sign! So of course he will provide me the extra portions of strenth - Nina, perhaps you are a vessel of His strengh! I will attach a piece of music for you. My mentality tonight is overdrawn so will save leaning your new method for tomorrow - or soon. I love you. Oh, will also attach copy of my msucym overdue letter. A child waiting for God's work, June


My dear June; How glad I was to hear that I was of some comfort and strength for you, dear June! An answer to my prayer for you.... *smile* Isn't He just wonderful? It was just unbelievable that you should choose that particular piece of music, dear one - for it is the exact piece played by my most cherished of my collection of music boxes. It was given to me by my father when I was 6 years old. I never saw him again until I had a little girl of my own - and that small treasure was all I had of/from him until that new meeting. It is a lovely music box - walnut with glass covering inside the lid when you open and watch the movement - Swiss made and lovely of sound.... I can hardly believe that box can still play for all the times I have played it again and again all those years. It was my only way of connecting with the reality that I had a Daddy at all.... For the parting between my parents was so bitter and hate-filled that I was never allowed to see him again until I had left home and was married.   ~ He is long dead now - he died fairly young from the consequences of his life of drinking. I still cherish that box with all my heart. I think I would have to say I was more closely bonded to IT than to the man - and - on the bottom, he had written that he loved me. From that day until this - it has probably been more lasting love from any man - for it is written indelibly and it is still with me..... I wanted you to know all this, dear sister, for it seems to me that there truly is some spiritual bond put there between us by our angels... else how, in all the world of music - should it be that you chose that one which has told, assured me, me for 48 of my 54 years of life, *You are Loved* And you, my dear June, are loved and cherished by, Your GYPSY, (Nina)

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My Most Wonderful and Dearest Friend Nina;
I can never if I live to be 100 years find the right words to express my thanks to for sending us the URL for RAVENWIND. It is one thing of several that has been missing in my life as I have found things about myself there that I did not even know that I was hunting. I think that I may have told you that my great grandmother was a Cherokee Indian. Sheowolf has things in her pages that explain to me why I feel about things the way I do. It may seem strange to you but some of the stuff that she had in there seemed to me just like she was talking specially to me. It put chills up my spine. Maybe you can explain this for me. ( I hope) ~ I wrote her to tell her how much I loved her work and I do because she has the facts and I knew some of them to be true. I told her also that she had been born a couple hundred years to late as she would have made a wonderful medicine woman. I hope I didn't make her mad. She puts her heart and soul in her works the same as you do. Please tell me how you knew I needed that URL. Please don't get me wrong here because I Love your site also. Both of your sites deal with spiritual cultural and the higher power. The feeding of GODS' sheep is the same regardless if the sheep have white skin or happen to be Indian ( I have never seen an Indian with red skin) have you? Will close for my Dear Nina after wishing you goodnight and sweet dreams. Our Love and Hugs to You both.
Jim and Family

Dear {{{{{{{Jim}}}}}}} Please forgive my not answering today -
I am about to go to bed now - and had SOOoooo wanted to reply to you first - but it is too late now and I have been awakening every night and not getting the sleep I so need (still recovering from that long siege!) Hope Kayla and Barbara are better - will write to you tomorrow - I promise. Right now I have TWO Melatonin dissolving under my tongue and should go lay down so that they can have a chance to help. Usually one is adequate if I have any problem with sleeping (when the aching emptiness left behind and all around me when Eric and Buffy went ~home~ before me.... I know you understand). It's just a tough place in the road here this time of the year... Funny - Spring was always my very favorite time of year - how beautiful to die at a time that reminds us all of the new life provided for us by Christs' death - and we look all around and see what seemed to be dead - all coming back ever more beautiful year after year.... Gee!!!!! I just can't seem to write a short letter, can I!!! *giggle* - especially to you! Now I am absolutely going to I love you all, and our meeting is getting closer every week - I think the little girls are excited! *smiling*
Yours because I'm His and love you, {{{{{{{Kayla & Barbara}}}}}}}
Your GYPSY, ( Nina) & Brandi

Subject: SheoWolf and Indian Lore ~ Hello Jim;
Well, the sun is peeking out between the mist and the scattered rainclouds which I haven't heard might be delivering more free water for our reservoir or not today... *S* Our flowers are all growing so fast I can almost see them as they move upward!!!!   ~  Re: SheoWolf... she had such beautiful pictures! Particularly the one scene here which I found breathtaking (attached). Her soulful writing is awesome. And the music - .... Ahhhhh.... Except that I was disappointed with some of the changes she just recently made (in last three days) in the music selections... I have always had such a compelling interest in the American Indians which led me to study them. I've done a LOT of that! ~ Then I was horrified with some of their customs and traditions, yet fell in love with some of the others which were so wise and pure of heart in way of community-living. I think that the writer or artist in me always falls in love with romantic and passionate people and customs.... And so it is with the Indian lore..... That was why Eric and I were so closely bonded.... He was so passionate and artistically talented and we shared that and appreciated it in each other.... But in the case of the Indians - it is such a MIXED bag of emotions I feel toward them!!!! Romance wins, however - and I found the music haunting and beautiful (Two of them - she has changed many of them now - did you get there while she was using the panpipe one?)     I used one of the midi files here too, and a picture I borrowed from her (she invites/permits that on her site....
http://www.user.shentel.net/nbaker/Mine/Creative/Submision.htm
If the truth be known -  I believe all would have to confess to some degree of love and kinship with Indian-culture. When it comes to the spiritual realm, I don't believe that I am to judge even those who chose satan-worship and witchcraft/paganism - etc. etc. As a Christian who believes that the only way to Eternal Life is through Christ, I feel a weight of concern for any who reject Him and choose other gods and practice self-salvation through any sort of rituals or ~works~ of their own... That is inherent in the belief and teachings of Christ-followers. If we did not feel that concern - we would be selfish and unloving to not care that all come to know Christ and enter into Eternal Life in the way we believe is the only way.... But I do not (nor did Christ Himself) believe in battering others or pointing fingers of accusation and condemnation, for where people take that upon themselves - they also dethrone God and sit in His place.. for He has said that He alone judges - Amen! Only He knows the purity of love in any heart and in any choice or action on man - for He reads what is written in the heart.... Sorry for the delay in responding - but I haven't even caught Brandis' journal up yet - not since her Papaws' sudden and unexpected death! It seems that either I am busy or she is busy playing or we are both busy and/or playing together... and even her e-mail sometimes doesn't get checked for days! :-( But we are working on it. Hope all are well, yourself included....
Bye for now, Love and hugs from, ~ your GYPSY, (Nina)

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From: Bill Odom willgo@televar.com ~ Subject: Guest Book
Nina: Just wanted to thank you for the invitation to visit your site and for the opportunity to get to meet you. There is nothing harder in life then for a parent to lose a child but yours is a strong spirit. You have created a beautiful memorial to your son Eric and in so doing have climbed from the darkness of despair back into the light. My best to you my Gypsy friend of the Shenandoah Valley. May you always to walk in peace and light. Bill ~ aka Three Paws Visit my Sites Personal Site:
http://www.televar.com/~willgo Home of The Brotherhood of the Wolf Business Site: http://www.artpros.com Home of the Idaho Shopper
We are remembered by the tracks we leave behind ...

Hello Bill; Thank you! For visiting with me, for signing in (and for letting me know that you couldn't the first time you came ! ;-) I knew you were going to come back! Did you find the jug I ~set out for you?~ *grin* Bill, that was my first personalized award, and I thank you so very much for it! *S* How sweet of you, I appreciate it so very much. What a wonder it is for all of us to get together as we do here this way..... isn't it? Hope that grass is growing real pretty for you there! *Teeheehee*
Hugs {{{{{{{Bill}}}}}}} From your GYPSY, (Nina)

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"ChristiAna Sandru" revchris@golden.net ~ Subject: Thanks
It is beautiful, You have skills and a heart. May the good Lord bless you, ~ Christian Sandru

"Though our task is not to bring all the world to Christ, our task is unquestionably to bring Christ to all the world."
(Dr. A.J. Gordon)

Hello Christian; What a neat NAME to have! And then to be one too.... your mother must surely have loved you and the Lord and devoted herself (and her children)to Him... Blessing you, I am sure. Thank you for blessing me with a visit and acknowledgment/appreciation that you were here.
Yours because I'm His, Your GYPSY, (Nina)

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"John S. Petralito" Advrehtec@de-inc.com
Subject: RE: Saved and Baptized. He continues to bless us... gypsy, (Nina) ~Last Sunday, My wife and I were BAPTIZED by our Pastor. It was so good to leave the old "us" behind. The ceremony was wonderful (full body soak) and unlike when I was a baby, we knew what was going on. We have been blessed. We let JESUS in and HE has wrapped his arms around us. When we left the church, it was snowing. What a sign that JESUS sent us that the air was cleansed and we were too. Then when we woke the next morning, we saw a beautiful blue sky, a warm day and a strong sun. I then started my new job that morning and flew to NJ to start my first day of training. "God has a simple plan of salvation for all of us" I am glad that my wife and I (both 44) were able to understand this blessing. HE has showered us with blessings. In HIS name we pray. HE is "I AM" , ~ John

Dear John & Wife; Thank you so much for sharing the wonderful news with all of us here! Congrats! on your new carreer ascension too! *S* Will look forward to hearing from either or both of you again in the future. Love Hugs! Yours because I'm His, Your GYPSY, (Nina)

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From: Hope Saxton hopewrites@yahoo.com
Subject: Awards From Hope ^A^
Dear Nina, I have spent the last two days going over your site and am so grateful that you happened by my page, so we could meet. I am in awe of your courage, as well as the beautiful words you write. Your tribute to Eric is a wonderful way to honor his memory and aid others in their own healing. You will meet again...I believe this. I am enclosing two awards. One is for writers and the other is only given to special sites that touch my heart. I would like to present them from my heart, to yours. Your site is one of the most deserving I have come across. 'GOODBYE' made me cry and the love in your poetry is amazing. You may link them back to my site at:
http://www.geocities.com/Athens/Forum/2124 if you like. They are gifts and as such, are yours to do with as you please.
It was very nice to have met you, Nina and I hope we can keep in touch. I also enclose an unending supply of HUGS (for you to take out in times of sadness). I wish everything for you. ~ Blessings, Hope ^A^

My dear Hope! I loved your dove when I first encountered it in surfing, it is one of the most beautiful awards I have ever seen. Thank you or awarding it to me! Thank you for them both! I have never sought any awards, and each one is such a thrill to receive from the giver. I cherish yours. But more than the lovely awards you have created and given to me - it is the love and soulful sharing which you took time to do with me, that I cherish most of all. Thank you, Hope, for all of it, and most of all, the love. My site, like yours, is everemerging and growing... so I hope that you will return from time to time to find a few new laughs in the humor section r keep up with Miss Brandi - or just whatever may bless you.... Yours because I'm His, Love and hugs, {{{{{{{Hope}}}}}}} Your GYPSY, (Nina)

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*apology* Dear friends, *apology*
I apologize for a ~quiet time~ here. As the second anniversary of Erics' death (and first of Buffys'), approached, I found myself less capable of everyday responsibilities, often getting lost in the world of memories or obsessive work which I customarily use as a narcotic in times of pain/stress. (It works for me - and it is quite advantageious for my surroundings!!! *grins*)
I was keeping a file of the incoming page-mail for about two weeks... (just too difficult for me to deal with at the time - I needed to be physically busy). Somehow, that file disappeared from my mail program. I searched through the windows system and all that - and perhaps one day I will yet run across it and answer those kind and caring messages which I always reply to. I feel badly about the loss and want to say here to anyone who may have written since the 21st and did not hear from me - I did receive your messages and planned to catch up today... and I'm not at all sure what happened when I clicked on it *sob, sniffle* to do the folder this morning... but I cannot find it! *More, sobbing, sniffling*. If I should find it in the future - you will hear from me and the messages will be added to this guestbook #7. again..... s-o-r-r-y! ~


From: Mike Owens docbrat@yahoo.com
Subject: Re: Crucifixion article
Gypsy; are you the one who wrote about the three sabbaths?

Dear Mike.... Yes.... All materials on my site are credited either to others or myself (or Mr/Ms Anon E. Muss *giggle*) ~ Have a nice day.... *S*
From your GYPSY, (Nina)

From: Tammye Owens tammyeo@yahoo.com
Subject: Your page story of Eric
Dear Nina, I just wanted to let you know I visited your website today. I could not sign the guestbook as I couldn't it to open up. I'm new at all this. Anyway I read all about Eric and some of the letters people wrote to you. I am truly blessed by it all. I've never been really good at writing, but enjoy it so reading other people's, especially the poetry. I have written some myself. Eric was a very talented young man and I know you are very proud of him. Six years ago I lost my best friend to cancer, so I can relate to anyone who's lost someone close to them. Its been by far the hardest thing I've ever had to go through. I can't even begin to imagine the death of a child. I have a fifteen year old son and a fourteen year old daughter both of which are now learning to drive and its really scary sometimes. Thank you for sharing your story to the world, it has really been an inspiration to me today.
In Christ, Tammye


Hello Tammye;    Thank you very much for writing to me. My guestbook is my own and not served by any other site. I had the traditional ones at first - but grew to not feel comfortable about advertisements on my site. It is my gift and not for anyones' profit. Just didn't sit well with me, so I use this e-mail forum. I also like to answer the e-mail - and/or - offer anonymity to those who write and do not want to be public. I am pleased that you enjoyed your visit with me and hope that you will return again. The site is so large and varied in the offerings. *S* Sorry to hear about your loss of a friend to cancer. I have lost rather many friends to that. One of Erics' best friends just died a month ago of a particularly aggressive type of bone-cancer. He struggled so valiantly and went through all the treatments until the very end. I was blessed to be able to visit with him in Richmond a few days before his death. His story is here.... Scott   Thank you again for communicating with me.
Yours because I'm His, From your GYPSY, (Nina)

From: mike owens docbrat@yahoo.com
Subject: comments on three sabbaths
Gypsy: By the way, I like your name. It is so refreshing to find someone who actually agrees with me. I became a christian in 1974 after going to a Teen Chalange meeting. Shortly after that, because of several problems involved in a Friday crucifixion/ Sunday ressurrection, I came up with the idea for a Wednesday crucifixion/ Saturday ressurrection (I even have a date, April 14, 27AD). However, you are mistaken about the Day of Preparation. Christ was crucified on the Day of Preparation, as you stated, but it was on Nisan 14 not 13. The Feast of Passover and the Feast of Unleavened Bread are so intimately related that with the passage of time they became as one holiday, the 14th being the day of preparation, and the 15th being celebrated as the Passover, and the 16th was the Feast of First Fruits. For an excellent book of the christian meanings of the Feasts of the Lord read: "The Feasts of the Lord" by Kevin Howard and Martin Rosenthal, Thomas Nelson Publishers, Nashville. Please think kindly of me, my intent is not to demean your convictions, but merely to share common beliefs with a kindred spirit.
ICJ ~ Docbrat

Hello Again, Mike! ----> By the way, I like your name.
^Thank you, I like it too. My father named me! A Jewish friend wrote me and told me that the Jewish meaning of Nina, is a pearl... *s*.... My fiancι agrees with that and says I am, to him, definitely, "of great price" (see why I am marrying him? *giggle*) Think "kindly of you" ???? I Love encountering a kindred spirit, I find it so delightful to study the word and grow. Although it usually means a rather lonely stand in convictions and knowledge, I, like you, feel very humble and meek about my learning, and am always open to more and more - (hungering and thirsting always!). I will get the book you mentioned and study some more! *smiling* Thank you so very much for bringing new light to me! Currently, I am studying all about angels. THAT is a most sobering and enlightening experience, for sure... and in the process, I've had to look around and see how many New-Age influences are even here around me at home! So far - I know that all angels are men, none have wings (only the Cherubim and Seraphim have wings) It's almost as bad as the SantaClaus recognition/upheaval here which took place here many, many years ago! (did you discover that yet on my site?) I have little time at this time of the year - for I love to preserve foods and an at the end of that season with only tomatoes left to be doing (am doing that today - 48 quarts!) But your message makes me want to drop everything and jump into study!  *RVBS!* I hope that you will continue to explore and share with me! May we have an e-mail fellowship? I would like that.   Is Tammye your wife? And - would you share a little more about yourself? (both of you if related). Don't even know where you are geographically - but then, that isn't nearly so important as where you are Spiritually, and I know about that already! *grinning!* Thank you so very much. And tell me - is the book you recommend, the source from which you got the information I missed in my study? If not - what are your sources. I just came across it all from so many sources that I don't really remember them all. I remember using the works of Josephus and others.... Well... please continue to write. I cherish every meeting and association with fellow-sojourners and students of the Word. God is so good to unite us in special fellowships of like-mindedness. Isn't He wonderful? *joyful-smile*
Yours because I'm His,
>From your GYPSY, (Nina)

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Subject: Re: Hi !!!!! This is Just Jim Checking in, Again,

MY Dear Nina, Just a short note tonight to let you know I still have you in my Prayers and heart at this terrible time of remembering the awful loss of losing your son Eric so suddenly at the time when he was just beginning to enter into his life long dream. there is no telling what he would have accomplished judging form what he had already succeeded in overcoming in his very short stay here on this earth with you. He done things that other young people only dream of doing when they had the same chance as he only they let theirs' slip away like mist in the morning sun where Eric used each day to further his education to the utmost and would not let any obstacle stand in his way. We have no way of knowing what he would have become if he had but stayed home that night and received that letter of admission into the next step of his education. I would be willing to bet that he would have been a note worthy person as he was already gaining note worthy characteristics. In reading about him it seems he should have been older than he was. Most people could not do what he done education wise in twice the time in school as they would not utilize there time to study as Eric did. A lot of them just wanted to have a good time and party. Your Son spent his party time helping others to overcome their obstacles as he was doing that terrible night two years ago. If it had not have happened he would most likely have been helping some one tonight as he was then. Whenever he come to an obstacle and figured out by himself how to get across I can not see him going on to the next one without first looking back to see if any one needed help getting across whether it was a friend or a total stranger he would offer a hand. Now then if all of the ones that he has helped likewise offered a little of themselves to others in turn as Your son Eric what a great difference it would make in this World of ours? You could say that He had added to the good of man kind. He has left his mark on a lot of folks at any rate and you should be proud of him My Dear Nina. I pray that you were able to take a smile with you today. I Know it was hard for you, but I would like to believe that he would like for you to have brought one or he might think that you wanted him to be back in this SIN ridden world that we live in. I must close now Our Dear Sister Nina as I need to rest up for another day at work. If I could make you feel any better by doing so I would stay up all night and write back and forth but I would just keep bringing up things that would add to your hurt which I have already done tonight my Dear. I am sorry. I will check on you tomorrow evening if I do not have to work-over. You can answer when you feel like it Dear One as we will be waiting right here holding you tight in our hearts and in our prayers and will keep you there until which time GOD calls and says "Come It Is Time To Come Home, Nina I Have Prepared A Special Place For You Right Here Beside Your Son, Eric, and Other Loved Ones" Oh what a great day it will be in Heaven that day. Now My Dear Nina I must warn you that I will ask GOD to put this off just as long as he can without it interfering with his grand plan as there are still a lot of lost sheep that need you to help them get back to the flock. Good Night or morning Dear Sister.
With Our Love and Hugs ~ {{{{{{ OUR NINA}}}}}
Jim, Barbara & Kayla,

Wednesday, 4/1/98 - Hello Jim (and also Barbara) First, will share a bit of last nights' journal which was more or less addressed to Eric, actually....
Tuesday, March 31, 1998
Gee - just like old times.... actually clicking on the days' date and wanting to write about the day. Not that there is anything particularly spectacular or unusual about this second eve of April 1st after your leaving, Eric, and the first of Buffys' leaving to join you (if such faithful and loving spirits do go to heaven....?) This evening, at dusk, Brandi brought me a little bouquet of our flowers from up there in what used to be the Tulip-bed when you were born.... They are our Hyacinths, which are so nicely fragrant (like lilacs) and this year, quite deeply colored. I thought of you, my dear son. It seems like just a few years ago when it was you bringing these same flowers in to me in your little 8 year-old hands, giving flowers to your mommy. You continued to give them to me for the rest of your life, too! I remember..... And then, last year, those forget-me-nots which bloomed for Mothers' day.... flowers I had not planted and had failed to have grow successfully for me before then. They would bloom and look so lovely, but when summer came, would die off.... I'm hoping that they will come to me again this year too. It felt like they were a very special gift last year... my first year without you, my son, here with me in this world. But you are with me so strongly, and I guess that you always will be - for I cannot imagine myself ~not~ as your mother.... It seems to me, as your pages grow online in the cyberworld, that you live on and grow endeared and even mourned-for in the world every bit as though you were still among us... It is a form of immortality to be a writer and express thoughts and feelings that not all know how to put into words. This year will be a new tradition. I will be taking gingerbread up to Freesoul and sharing it with all the little inhabitants of that portion of the earth where you are most a part of earthly things yet.... (Aside from in my heart and our home...) It felt good that the weather has turned so gentle and flowers are blooming and your memorial-area fountain is flowing melodically, its' sound even coming up from under the deck and audible in the kitchen with the doors open. How I pray that I will be able to get out there onto our rock - but if not, I will be close by along the ridge.... beside it - walking those paths we've walked together and remembering.... I remember you everywhere... all the time... but tomorrow, I will feel closer to where you have gone and await me. It is now a gentle reminder that I too will one day be released from the cares of this world and move on. This Spring would have been your graduation from post-grad school and you would have had your Masters' and might have even begun to teach as you had considered doing. Many writers are teachers as they write. Your love and comprehension of it all would have been a great gift and inspiration to many. Your death has been too. You have been like a great lighthouse in the midst of the entire world and because of you there, Even some lost and stranded souls have found their way to truth, light and for some.... healing. I still have not had that dinner at the Outback Steakhouse as we'd planned for so long... But I'm thinking that it will happen soon now. It will be one of the last of things you were so eagerly wanting to do, and now it will happen'..... just as your words are being read everywhere..... I can hear you telling me that I'm doing good... *S*

~ April 1: 1998 - 10:50 p.m. Dear Jim and Barbara,
The day went pretty well until now when the unbidden thought struck me without warning, "that right at this time, two years ago - Eric took his last breath". And I wasn't there. And I didn't know it for three hours! Now this night has become more painful having been slashed with that memory/thought coming at me out of ~the blue~..... My heart became so heavy... and then... I came into my mail and here was this wonderful letter from you, Jim, which touched me so very deeply. Not only because of your understanding and knowledge of my Eric.... but your understanding and bond of kinship with me... it is an extraordinary thing to be sure! I thank God with teary eyes and a most grateful heart that He has brought you into my life to extend to me such compassion and empathy for this narrow path in the shadow of the Valley of Death which I sometimes find myself precariously balanced upon.... He must have motivated you - knowing that I would be helped and comforted by your words this night. ~ The day was a nice one! Although we had a very hard storm around 11 o'clock - it passed on its' way and the rest of the day was wonderful..... ~ Pause: <Writing the above brought me to tears again, Eyes need a little rest - will go lay down a bit and see if they refresh themselves for a visit with you this evening here in e-mail.> ~ Today: (April 2nd) re: last night...... sorry, Jim, just had a little spell and shut down to go to sleep. Wanted to write now - but still am not ready - will be back later.... ~ Tonight......... So I am finishing up tonight.... then going to bed....I wanted to write - knowing that it would relieve you to know that I am okay - but there are human limitations and this was the first chance I could get back and do so. Forgive the time between. Please? ~ I'm really feeling pretty good. Feel very "at peace" as I always do when I go there.... It was a TERRIBLE ordeal physically for my feet and by about six o'clock I took pain medication which has subdued the beast adequately and I'm okay now.... VERY hard to climb a ladder (after the surgeries) without using the front half of your foot - but putting your feet through till you are putting main weight on heel area instead of normal position. The stepping across the two huge rocks. The wind kind of dries your eyes. And it was quite windy indeed! But the sun was very warm on our skin ... The gingerbread was probably the best I ever made! *S* I ate three pieces of it! (we were there for 5 hours) Part of the time I lay out on the rock right at the edge - on my back looking straight up at the sky and it almost felt like I was floating around in and/or under it! I never did that before. It used to seem much more dangerous to be on that rock than it does now that Eric is a part of the place and I know that I will be too. It seems so truly ~Home~ to me now - and non-threatening! I had never chosen a spot for my ashes and always told the family that they could do whatever they wished to do with them <except keep them> - for I strongly wanted to have my ashes return to the earth as God said.... I always felt it should be somewhere romantically beautiful - like the ocean or mountains..... a garden somewhere would have been okay too.... But since I had to make the choice for Eric - it became my own as well... and now there can be no other place.... *melancholy smile* I played the soundtrack from "Philadelphia" and then Shepherds' Moon (by ENYA).... Also, Vince Gills, Go Rest High On That Mountain. It was SOOOoooooo good that Roger stayed home from work and was with us - for the `state' had decided to work on scraping the road up through there today! That isn't much more than a horse trail already - and we had a terrible storm around noon - and given those two situations - the road was the worst challenge to navigate. I am not at all sure I would have been able to do it at all! I would have had to return in evening after the big equipment was out of the road! ALSO - it was good that he allowed me to ~walk over him~ *teeheehee* (a real first!) - between the two huge rocks which would have hurt these feet so much MORE if he had not allowed himself to be a bridge.... *S* Peach and Brandi were there... God was there...*S* A hawk, as usual, appeared... I don't think I ever feel alone there..... Need to stop here. Kind of a mixed bag here - some of Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday and it's already early Friday morning!
Well - that fills you in about the day... and I have to get to bed..... Will get back to normal soon.... *s* Hope all is well there...
Love and hugs for you, dear brother and sister and Kayla...
From your GYPSY, (Nina)

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From: "Linda Rekshan" rekshanl@pilot.msu.edu
Dear Nina--- It is 5:05 a.m. and my worries have awakened me well before I'd like to be up. I discovered you as a result of my computer search regarding "prayer". What a blessing your words have been! Through you and your wonderful words, the Lord has been able to work. My heart has softened and I am able to allow in His healing comfort and peace (the peace which transcends all understanding). Thank you for your ministry and the opportunity of enjoying your God-given talents. Keep up the great work. ~ William Rekshan.

Subject: Re: Prayer pages
Hello Friend (William?) ~ How blessed it makes me feel when I receive a message such as yours - for it is the most fulfilling and wonderful feeling to know that He has been able to use me. I hope that you will come again - for there is so much to see at our site. Thank you for letting me know you were here and blessed by Him through the visit! I am.... Have enclosed a midi that always comes to my mind when I know that He has used me... "We Are An Instrument"
Yours because I'm His, ~ Nina

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From: Gerald Baker mslman@cei.net ~ Subject: Site
While surfing the net for sites about Warren, I came across your site. You have done a magnificent job!!! I really enjoyed my visit. ~ 
Gerald Baker 
~   http://www.cei.net/~mslman

Hello ~Fellow `Bakers' ~ My very best/closest and dearest penpal is a REAL Razorback fan and is also a neighbor of yours, Leona Littlefield. Thanks for visiting and for the compliment!    Always like getting strokes. *RVBG!* You have a lovely family and have done a nice job of sharing them on-site. *S* Thank you. I didn't see an awards page - so I will just inspire you to create one, for I am sending you one from me. *g*

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"JOHNENE I. ANDERSON" JOHANDER@nmu.edu  
~ Subject: thank you
Dear Nina, I'm sorry for your loss and know your pain,
as I lost my earthly father almost two years ago and your pain touched me deeply. My dad died just after I entered college and I so much wanted him to see me graduate. I wanted him to be proud of me. He did get to see his forty-two year old daughter graduate from high school with straight A's, but I wanted to do so much for him and now he's gone. The one thing we know is that the Precious Lord on high will reunite us with all of our loved ones in the hereafter. I pray that God will continue to bless you and fill your life with Christian friends and love. I am strongly opposed to abortion and printed out your "LEGACY OF ABORTION", I hope you don't mind, I'm going to share it with anyone I can get to read it. Again, I thank you and your son. God's Peace and Love, Sunny

Dear Sunny; Thank you for your compassion and your sharing. I can well relate to your wanting your father with you when you graduate... and how you must have missed him on that occasion. I attended Erics' graduation a few weeks after he was killed and I, with utmost pain - received his B.A. (MagnaCumLaude) and visited with his campus of friends.. It was one of the most difficult of things I have ever done. Even after these two years, I still hear from his friends. How wonderful that you returned to college! It makes me wonder what your reasons were to do so..... a calling to a particular career? Thank you for taking and sharing from this ministry, I am so happy that you did. The Christ asked, three times in a row, "Lovest thou me? Feed my sheep" God will be blessing you and keeping you as you set out to accomplish whatever it is you want to do with your life. Thank you for sharing a part of that with me. Love & Hugs,   ~  Yours because I'm His, Nina

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jkerrig@banet.net ~ Subject: God Bless You And All Of Us!`
May God Be with us in all times of our lifes good or bad!
~ Jackie

He is, Jackie. Always and always will be. Yours because I'm His ~ Nina

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Selena Coy shibner@ind.tds.com ~ Subject: GOD BLESS YOU
YOU ARE A VERY CARING AND LOVING PERSON .
You have reminded me how short life can really be so we should treasure each moment because the next could be are last . I have 4 angles and I don't know what I would do without them and hope to never find out. My oldest just turned 16 and is driving and it scares me so, a boy I know that was only 26 got killed in a car wreck two weeks ago .I told my Trisha I was not going to let her drive anymore and she said mom that does not mean I will not leave you some day just because you will not let me drive I told her I know I just love you so much. Thank you for reminding me how wonderful our kids are. I really love your site I know your Eric would love what you have done for him . I would wish all would realize how wonderful their kids are and that God gave them a wonderful gift and they should cherish it because it can be toke from them in a blink of a eye. thank you so much with love from one mother to another ~ Selena


Dear Selena; It always blesses me to hear from our visitors. Thank you so much for writing. For some reason, I have always felt and raised my children to feel, the importance of each day and every parting. Perhaps it was because of the fact that I read a lot and learned so long ago how sadly many people take things for granted! Perhaps it was the Spirit that brought me to that awareness of how precious every moment is. I am very glad that I always was that way... for when I read of those who part forever with anger or anything other than love and appreciation in their hearts.... I wonder how they can bear that. It is hard enough even if you did hug, kiss, wave and thank God for your loved ones' existence... to have them never come home again. Your daughter is right... we all have our appointed time to leave this existence and graduate into Eternity. *S* It sounds as though you have raised her well and to be wise. *S* Our children are not only our gift FROM God, but our gifts TO Him as well. I hope you will visit again - We are much too big and varied to be seen in one visit! *s* ~ Yours because I'm His, Nina

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Raj Roy ~ Subject: Hello
Dear Mrs. Baker, I am Noel's mother, Renu. You might wonder at this message at this time. I will be honest with you. I tried writing cards to you for the past three years and just could not go through with it. I am ashamed of my lack of strength. Even now the tears are just flowing and I do not understand it. From the moment I saw you at the graduation ceremony, I have held you in high esteem and admire you greatly. I know that you write to Noel and he writes to you. He does not share your relationship with me and I respect the fact that he needs his privacy. Eric meant so much to him that there are no words to describe it. I am a believing Christian, but for a very long time I could not accept the Lord's decision to take Eric to Him. Even now every time I look at Noel, I know that although he has not said anything in these three years, I know the pain in there. I thank and praise the Lord for your wonderful son whose life has meant so much to my son and therefore also to me. When Noel was at Ferrum he always told us how he was in good company and being looked after by Eric and was having great fun and not to worry about him being lonely. That made the pain of parting for me so much easier. I was so anxious to meet this young man. He meant so much to Nigel too because Noel's friends were his now. I feel somehow it is easier for me to write to you now, while Noel is in the States and I am on my own here. I cannot understand my own feelings of this grief or the tears. May be someday I will be able to see you. I cannot stop these tears from falling and I do not know how to write all that I feel. I am so glad that Noel will be seeing you. I do not know exactly when he is coming to you. I pray for you every day and ask the almighty father to shower His richest blessings of peace, good health and happiness in rich abundance on you. With prayers and good wishes, Renu

Hello My Dear Renu; How blessed I was to receive your communication with me! Most of all, because Noel now feels to me to be my son in a way - for the closeness and intimacy of friendship between our sons was so special and Eric lives on in Noel. Also - Noel gave me the greatest peace in being right there with Eric through his last breath of this physical life, and he knew and related to me that not one moan or cry of pain ever came from those precious lips of my son as he passed from this life on to the next.... And so I know of certainty, as only one who was actually present WITH Eric at those last moments, COULD possible know and report, that Erics' death came entirely painlessly and instantly... and what more could a mother need to know and hold dear about the circumstances... that this priceless knowledge that God appointed Noel to impart to me! And even more - that he died with his dear friends in his cherished Firebird, at the pinnacle of academic achievements and honors - accepted to a top post-grad school (which, though he did not get to hear that the acceptance to William and Mary had arrived that very day, he did, none-the-less, achieve that honor and success of his pursuit of desire for further learning...) Even Erics' intent of giving his night to help another student added a noble note which exemplified who and what Eric was as a young man who was always ready and willing to serve or in any way meet the needs of those who requested or needed of him as Dr. John Hart had requested of in the tutoring he was returning to do that night. I could not have chosen circumstances more comforting than exactly as they happened on that night, dear Renu... with Noel there at his side and an unbroken bond & relationship which remains between intact with your son who is so caring, compassionate and so honorably high in personal and spiritual integrity! I am blessed through your son (both of your sons, in fact....)...and that is a blessing bestowed upon me by you and your husband and by our God. I thank you for that. Yesterday, Noel arrived around lunchtime and we all ate together ... Later, in spite of a light rain now and then - the four of us, Bill, Noel, myself and Brandi, all went up to Freesoul where Noel was at last able to share that incredible experience of so spiritual a place as where we took Erics' remains. This rock was where Eric first said to us "Mommy, I want my name to be written in The Lambs' Book Of Life". I have shared about that on the internet site where you may visit and even see Eric at that young age and the pictures of his three-fold baptism in the same river where I myself was baptized myself at another time. There was always something very special and spiritual about Erics' life - and I feel so blessed that God gave me such a son for so many years as I had him with me. When I see Noel, and when we talk of Eric, I feel so good. I think Noel does too. Eric and I shared a lot of the same uniqueness of personality, and it is fun to share that as it feels to both of us as though it is Eric we are with... *S* I hope that you do not mind that I feel somewhat of a mother- bond with Noel? Brandi has always liked him a lot too, and yesterday, when he was with us, she was a bit melancholy and remembering Eric, (You could tell in her eyes and quietness,) and I think she must feel this mystery of bonding and of Erics' presence in Noel as stayed very close to him and even sat on the floor at his feet leaning up against his leg as he sat talking to me here at the computer where we were sharing some of the music on Erics' pages "Online". Mother to mother - you will be glad to note that I fed him well and he ate heartily (as always! *smile*) - I lectured him on the necessity of eating more vegetables (which he told me, grinning, that you lecture him about and insist upon as well.... so he understands that" mothers are like that!" as he put it. And, when he was insisting on leaving last night, with rain and some fog, I insisted that he use Bills' anti- fog spray on his windows and that he call me when he arrived safely home with Nigel again. Once again, he grinned, nodding, and affirmed that he understood how ~Mothers worry~ and that I would need that call from him before I would rest well... Indeed - it was 4 a.m. and I was still awake when he did call! It is understandable to all of us, that I suffer more than a common anxiety about the hazards of the unexpected which may happen on a rainy night mountain road..... Well - I hope that you will write again, dear one! For we have a bond which our sons formed for us *smiles* and we are mothers & friends for life. Thank you so VERY, very, very much for writing to me. I ask of you often and send my prayers and love.... you mean a lot to me through this unseen bond... and are a part of my life forever. Although sharing pain and grief may bring tears, dear Renu - it also brings comfort, strength and healing and you blessed me with every word, feeling and thought you sent! Thank you again! Until next we speak...
With love and hugs, I remain, Yours because I am His (Gods'), Nina

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Terry Hand tlhand@mindspring.com ~ Subject: Loved your website!
Your website was an inspiration to me.
Thank you. Denee Hand, Atlanta, GA

Thank you, Denee, for sharing your appreciation with me. It always blesses me to know. Yours because I'm His, In Christ ~ Nina

From: Terry Hand
tlhand@mindspring.com
Subject: You are in my prayers!
Dear Nina and family, I took the time to read your whole website. I know that even though you are grieving, the Lord Almighty can comfort you and wrap His arms around you. Sometimes He will send angels to minister to you during your lowest moments. I am eternally touched about Eric's life and how he expressed himself through his writing. I was happy for him as he went to college and found more than solitude. I have a son in middle school that has a hard time fitting in the normal school setting. He is much more advanced in his outlook on life and he expresses his problems in his writing. We have been told that he needs counseling because he is not like everyone else. He is a delight to me at home! I want him to be himself, not trying to follow the most popular group or groups that want to feel superior to others. I wanted to let you know that so many middle schoolers do not fit in at that time of their lives. Some blossom in high school and some in college. It is not an easy time in a child's life. The only true meaning in life is having a relationship through knowing Jesus Christ in a personal way . That is the answer for any problem. It does not mean the road ahead is an easy one, but you have Jesus to help you! May our Lord and Saviour comfort you and ease your pain from missing Eric. Ask the Lord to take your heart and hug it daily! Get into the word of God to see what He has for you now! I will pray for you and your family. Love from our family!
John 14: 26, 27
"But the Comforter, which is the Holy Ghost, whom the Father will send in my name, he shall teach you all things, and bring all things to your remembrance, whatsoever I have said unto you. Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid."
D. Hand ~ Atlanta, GA

Hello again; I sure know and identify with where you are.
As I continue to get into more of Erics' writings, your son might like to read Erics' some from when he was near that age. I probably won't be accomplishing much over the summer - for I don't get much time online when we can be outdoors! *big smile* Hopefully, if you visited the spiritual and prayer sections of our site - you know and will be assured by my relationship to our Father who is Lord of all that I do and all that I am, think or feel. This world is most definitely not my home, it never was Erics' either. I believe that those of us who remain free and independent of group-thinking and behaviors - feel this estrangement to a painful degree all of our lives. But we are only appointed to be in this world, not ~Of~ it - so this is as it should be. Conformity was NEVER once a part of Christs' exemplary life, was it! *S* I thank you for your prayers on our behalf, and we will be lifting you and your family as well. *S* Since I am quite involved in time-consuming activities with my 8 year-old Brandi, I doubt that I will complete the book on children and handicaps, for two years or so... but any thoughts or experiences you might want to share with me about that will be considered and drawn from where appropriate, (if you should want to do that). Standing alone and being ones' *own person* is a most definite handicap - even if only social in nature. If you read of my Brandi, you know that she has overcome many handicaps and has progressed beyond the power of them and is even mainstreaming with her peers with little real difficulty. Time consuming and demanding of dedication and perseverance, but rewarding in many ways too, especially in the close bonding between us (very much like her Uncle Eric and I). I can see that you have that with your son too. Thank you for sharing our life and communicating with me. I would look forward to a continued correspondence if you like. Yours because I'm His, In Christ ~ Nina

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Audree Hurlburt Audree@worldnet.att.net
Hi Nina, well it has been a long time since i have been here and you have certainly added more neat things. I now have pages of my own and would like to put a banner link to yours if you don't mind. I have not set up your url yet, because I wanted to with you first. I am the lady from the Circle of Friends that posted to my penpal group about your beautiful site and so I hope now I may be honored in sharing your site always. God Bless and a very Happy Mother's Day to you Audree Hurlburt ~
http://www.geocities.com/Heartland/Flats/5746/

Subject: Re: Hi presenting "Misty Mountain Award to you
Good Morning Audree', Thank you my dear friend. Happy Mothers' day to you! I am honored to appear with you and thankful that you have chosen to do ~ Yours because I'm His, Your GYPSY, (Nina)

Date: Sun, 10 May ~ Awards sent ~ Subject: Most beautiful
From: Audree Hurlburt
Audree@worldnet.att.net
Well what a Mother's Day gift you have given me, and thank you so much, it is beautiful, looks like Tenn. I used to live in Maryville, Thanks Nina and that is too precious, will get it up this am God bless you and I am most honored Much love and Happy Mother's Day to you ~ Audree

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From: Paul pnb@cyberstate.infi.net ~ Subject: Hey!!!
My Dear Friend Nina, Hi!!! How are you???? I have had you on my mind and felt so bad for not writing to you.....I just wanted to send you this to let you know that there are still people out here that care about you. I know this must be a very hard day for you cause it sure is for me too. But I will get through it. I just wanted to let you know you are not forgotten by me. Please take care and write when you have the time. Sincerely, Paul ~
http://www.cyberstate.infi.net/~pnb

Hello Paul; So nice to hear from you again - it's been a while! I thank you for thinking of me on Mothers' Day. I know how much you are missing your mother as I miss Eric. When I created the page awards, I sent both the Misty Blue Mountain Award and The Eric Lee Baker Award for Poetry and Literary Excellence - to you for your page. I wondered why I had not heard from you and had not seen it put up - so am wondering if something went wrong and you perhaps did not receive them? Let me know, Paul, and I will resend. Bet you have your corn in and it's growing? *Yummmmm!* Perhaps Brandi and I will have to take a trip south and drop in for dinner? *giggle* Write and catch me up on your life if you get a chance. I know that, like me, you are probably busy outside more than inside (when the rain lets up!)... But would love an update. Hugs and love, Paul, to you and your beautiful family. 
From, Your Gypsy,  (Nina)

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From: Lana Whited nfs4334@ferrum.edu
Nina, Wes Astin forwarded me your message regarding Eric's Iron Blade reviews. I was happy to learn last semester that you've put up the web page and I'm quite impressed with it. Do you have a copy of the poem about Eric's death which I wrote and which was published in the Chrysalis last spring? (It's called "Crocus.") Let me know if you don't and I will happily e-mail it to you.  Eric was in two of my classes during the semester when he died. In fact, another student in one of those classes died the same semester. It was a small class (started out with around 10 students), and the deaths started at the top of the roll (the other student died before Eric and her last name started with "A"). That was a hard semester; in fact, I think the afternoon when I went to class after Eric's death (our class met at 2 p.m.), that was the toughest experience I've ever had in a classroom. I remember that one of Eric's friends sat in his seat that day, and although you might think that would make us feel strange, somehow it made us all feel better. And we talked about the novel we were supposed to talk about, because we thought that was what Eric would have wanted to do if he had been there. I believe the novel was "The Color Purple," by Alice Walker.
I can't count the times Eric sat in my office and talked about what movies he's seen and what movies he wanted to see. He always found it hard to believe if I hadn't seen a movie he really liked (the fact that the nearest theatres are an hour away and we all had work to do never struck him as good reasons for not going, I guess). His exuberance about film and music were what I liked best about him: that pure, unfeigned joy he had when he talked about it. His passion for it has continued to carry me through the quicksand of students whose attitudes about any cultural experience are all too often the opposite - so non-existant that they threaten to suck me down.  I never drive toward the college from Rocky Mount on 40 without thinking about Eric. I'm not sure I will ever be able to (and I'm not sure I want to). Well, I didn't mean to go on so. I've meant to write to you about the web page for months, and I'm glad Wes's message prompted me. Lana
"Never mistake knowledge for wisdom. One helps you make a living; the other helps you make a life." - Sandra Carey
Lana A. Whited ~ Associate Professor of English and Journalism ~
Ferrum College ~ e-mail:
lwhited@ferrum.edu

Dear Lana; Thank you so very much for your letter. It means much more than I could find words to say. Everything that everyone shares with me about Eric is so special to me! Did I meet you when I came to graduation? In case you haven't been to the site lately, I am sending you a file you might find helpful in checking to see if you've seen everything. Gee.... No! I never received any more mailings from Ferrum - but would SOOOoooo love to have your poem, Crocus. Do you mind it I post it on his site? Would you like to write a tribute/memorial `something' to put in that section? And - may I post your e-mail in the guestbook as well? There are many people who would enjoy reading what you had to say about Eric, but I realize you might not want it made public. I don't know if you would have seen the Autobiography he wrote the first year there, as an English assignment - but I am almost finished entering it into the computer - One last chapter to go...but it is posted ~ in-progress... Here I also have a lot of his poetry that you may never have seen, and will be posting that in the next month or two... the work goes slowly sometimes. (because of the emotions which accompany the work as I find that it enhances that sense of loss of all that he was and had to offer and all that we shared as mother and son and as writers and intellectuals who had a close relationship on many other levels of mutual talents and interests as well. *BTW* - The Color Purple was one of my all-time favorite movies from the time I first saw it. I have posted Erics' review too. Did you see Powder? It was one of the last movies Eric and I attended together and both loved! When I saw it again after he was dead - I was struck by the symbolic notes of it which applied to Eric as to the main character in the movie. There was a lot of Eric in that Character.... What do you think? I would be interested to hear about your opinion. Thank you for the time and effort you are so kindly willing to give to me. I appreciate it with all my being! I will send along postage to you too... if you send me your address as well. And - would it be possible to obtain other editions of Chrysalis? I would like to receive the issues. I feel a part of Ferrum because it was a large part of Erics' growth, life and fulfillment. Which reminds me, I have created an Eric Lee Baker (internet) award which I send to sites I find and feel that he would have felt commendable. After I created it, I began to think about the possibility of having them created in print and given out at both his High School and at Ferrum annually. Not sure about how I will go about it - but took my sketchbook to the printer Monday had he says he can do the same work I have done in computer-graphics creation. *smiles* You can check it out here, Lana. Would appreciate your opinion about my doing this at Ferrum too...
Thank you again! Love in Christ, Yours because I'm His, Nina
*******Note*******
Lana sent the poem  she wrote,  "Crocus" and I have published our communications here ..... 

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From: Arda Blevins arda2@bmi.net
Dear Nina -- What a beautiful tribute to your son!. He must have been a wonderful young man. Perhaps God, knowing the future for each of us, knew the best time to call him to sleep, before the terrible time of trouble that will soon come just prior to the second coming of Jesus. I am another mother who knows first-hand the deep pain of losing a child. I can see that God has opened a door for you to minister to others in a way that one only can if she has experienced the loss herself. Since the Bible says, "The living know that they shall die but the dead know not anything," I know my child is sleeping. But one day, an angel will gently pick her up and put her back into my arms. What a glorious day that will be. May God continue to bless you as you reach out to others. Arda Blevins


Hello Arda; Thank you for leaving me a message as you visited. I so appreciate that kind thoughtfulness. I am sorry to hear that you have also tasted the terrible pain of losing a child, but am comforted in knowing that you know she is safe and secure from all harm now and awaiting reunion with you. You also know of the commission we have been given in~ 2 Corinthians 1: 3&4. Amen, then.
Yours because I am His, ~ Your GYPSY, (Nina)

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LWare1@aol.com
Hi. I have been reading your memories of Eric. My son was killed in a car wreck on June 15, l997. I don't think it gets any easier. I miss him so much. He was my rock. I enjoyed your memories. Linda Ware


Hello Linda; Thank you for writing. I am so sorry that we share that terrible loss. There is nothing comparable - especially if you, as you say, like me, were so close to him. I don't know how old, or his name - but I see that you are still in the first year and close to the time of my loss two years ago. Please write more and we can share - I hope that perhaps I can help - I certainly know how much I have benefited most by those mothers who suffered the same loss.... My heart aches for you. The anniversary, I see, is soon approaching for you too. I went through the same terrible time on both anniversaries of the 1996 April first.... thinking of all the last things of those innocent and unsuspecting days of contentment in our life and relationship which would all too soon end.... Some people prefer NOT to talk about it. But many of us feel better to be able to share - and find that so often, those around us cannot bear it.... I hope that you have the comfort and support of family and friends - and please remember that I am here and always, always willing and ready to share with you, Linda. I embrace you with compassionate pain and anguish and send you, {{{{{{{Linda}}}}}}} cyber-hugs & love
Yours because I'm His.... ~ Your GYPSY, (Nina)

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Well hello to a Room-mate! *S* <50+ Chatroom>
So nice to see you here in the guestbook. No! I had no idea about the feathered-flight-attendants! But it makes sense to me! *G* Thanks for sharing that! *wink* And Love and HUGS for {{{{{{{Ken}}}}}}} Any more neat stuff to share? *S* Yours because I'm His,
Write again to Your GYPSY, (Nina)

 

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