December - 1998

My Dear Friends, (New and Old)

Aside from an injury which resulted in unexpected surgeries (2) which removed the meniscus from both knees (joint replacements are scheduled for the end of February).... It has been a year of continued healing and adjusting to Erics' death.
Brandi, for the first time in six years of going to school (she began going at three years of age! *smile*)... Has not missed ONE day! We are all so thankful and pleased with this improved health and immunity. Only one Asthma spell... so we might be experiencing that "outgrowing it" phenemona which I've heard about and we've all prayed for!

Our ~guestbook~ archives have grown to twelve! *WOW!* Thank you to all of you who have shared your thoughts and emotions there to reach
out to others.    The grief support ministry has been 
a beautiful and healing experience to us all.

After a five-year continuous separation, I am in-between divorce and remarriage.   Our prayer 
for you all is that the coming year will be
the best `ever' in your lives.   We're planning on 
that here too!   *smiling*    When I marry - I will 
post the pictures on page...

Miss Brandis' journal .... update
Brandi went through some painful experiences this year
and consequently,   we did not keep her online journal. She has said that she would like to begin to do it again in 1999 - so look for that in late March (after the surgeries) in case she begins them again. (I think she will)

Cherish each and every moment
with your loved ones.
I believe that my lifelong practice of that is the most sustaining strength I have
(past, present and future,)
now that memories are all that I have left of Eric to comfort me.
We cherished time and each other.
That is more than many people have while they yet exist in the same houses.
How I wish that everyone
would see that each moment is a precious potential for stored-up treasures
which we may draw from forever....
Create them, dear brothers and sisters....
create them now.
Don't let a day pass without depositing something into that memory-bank
which will brighten your days when clouds move in or a bright star in your life leaves you in a forever-darkened world without them.

I have no regrets or wasted time
to add to my burden of anguish.    How glad I 
am  of that!    But I have heard from many who , (heartbrokenly), do have those regrets - and 
they are more overwhelmed by that than by 
the absence of their beloved lost loved one!
Some, it seems to me, from their sharing, ....
will not forgive themselves,  and in some cases, 
hold the anger against their loved one as well,
who has , they feel, "abandoned them".

Let us so cherish our time with loved ones 
that when either we , or they,  depart this earthly realm, we can feel the joy of their arrival *home* with our Lord, and be grateful for, and comforted in, the time we did have, rather than bitter or 
angry about time we no longer do have together.

For, my dear brothers and sisters,
Remember! Our Christ said....
St. John, 14: 2, 3, 4

" In my Fathers' house are many mansions: if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you unto myself; that where I am, there ye may be also. And whither I go ye know, and the way ye know. "

Here are some of my favorite quotes from the year...

A snowflake is a very fragile thing, by itself.... but just look what happens when they stick together
You'll always miss 100% of the shots you don't take.
People don't care how much you know until 
they know how much you care.
The hardest thing in life to learn is which bridge 
to cross and which to burn....
David Russell
You cannot do a kindness too soon, for you never know how soon it will be too late...... 
Ralph Waldo Emerson

I want to repeat this from last year....
Although I grieve.......   sometimes to the point of near incapacity on certain days - I would NOT wish that God would return Eric to me here, in this world, from Paradise!   More often than not, my grieving is more my own strong desire to go there  too.    
Don't we all?

I had a wonderful son, in Eric,   with me for almost 23 years .     If you count, as some countries do, the time he and I were one together, almost 24!   And I can honestly tell you that I cherished my son from the moment I knew of his presence in my womb!
We loved and lived well.    I thank God for that nature which He created in me.   I pray that I can adequately share that with you and that you will open your heart and soul to a new awareness and perhaps a new way of life and relationships. People ask me again and again, how I have "gotten through it". That is the answer! This is the best I could hope to give to you all.

Thank you for coming here, and visiting with me and my loved ones.     From our house to yours,
Blessed Holidays !
and Blessed Everydays, Aways!!!

With Love, Your GYPSY, Nina & Family

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