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.April 26, 1996
Dear Nina,
..................Once
again, my sincere condolences. It has now been
over two weeks and I still can't believe that
happened. It has registered in my mind, but I still
expect Eric to walk through the door. Every night,
after he had finished his homework, he would come
visit Dave, Cardwell and me, and hassle us about not
having started our homework.
He would mess with the stereo, plop in a CD and seat
himself in our lazyboy.
..................It
has become extremely quiet and I strongly feel that
something is missing. Every time I go by his room, I
remember...... But they are good memories - and a
lot of them. I'll never forget the first time I met
Eric. Or the one night when he came and wanted to
crash in my room because his roommate had
<excerpted here>
...................Eric
was the closest I have had to family here, next to
Vishalini, and in many ways, he was like a brother.
He helped me through many a difficult time and was always
there for me. If it had not been for him, a year
ago, I would have been a nervous wreck. In a way, we
were good for each other, as we shared similar
experiences and we thought alike.
...................When
I talked to Eric, it was not about music or movies,
but about our personal lives and the problems we
were dealing with. He was always correct in his
advice and an extremely good listener. It was a
great comfort for me to have somebody like him to
confide in. I hope that I was able to aide him just
as much in his problems, although his were always
far more complex.
...................Nina,
I'm sure you already know what a great son Eric was,
but I'll never forget what he did for me and the
great friend he was. I'm
honored to have been one of Erics' friends and to
have spent the last three years here at Ferrum with
him. It has been due to people like him that I have
been able to live away from the family and feel
comfortable here.
..................He
will never be forgotten and will live on in my
memories of him and I am happy to have spent the
last three years with a good friend like Eric. I
really miss him and things will never be the
same..... but life goes on and I believe he would
have wanted us to make the best of it.
....................If
there is anything I can do, please do not hesitate
to ask, and I look forward to seeing you all again
sometime soon.
Yours affectionately,
...Noel
Roy
Date:
Sun, 28 Sep 1997 10:16:47 -0400
Subject: Webpage
Dear Nina, How are you?
Well through Dave I was able to hear about the
wonderful
webpage you set up for Baker(Eric). I don't know
what to say except for thank you for sharing your
son with us. Thanks to modern technology we are all
able to now stay in touch, and I am glad that I have
your e-mail address as well. The page is really beautiful, it's obvious that you
spent a lot of time to make it as perfect as it is,
but it was worth every minute. It's strange to think that it has been now over a
year and a half,
but it seems that we have all somehow managed to get
back on our feet, however, in our minds it is still
like it all happened just yesterday.
Well, instead of dwelling in the past and wondering
why such a good friend was lost, I have come to
terms in dealing with how lucky I was to have met
such a great person, and what an honor it was to be
able to spend four years together with him.
I learned a lot, not only about music, literature,
film, poetry,
but also about the facts of life. I know that I can
say that Baker made my four years at Ferrum the most
valuable and unforgettable years of my
life. Not only did he share his family
with me, mine being so far away, but he also was
ready to listen to my problems and share his time
with me.
I am glad that I got to meet you Nina, and the rest
of the family, and to have gotten such a precious insight into his
life and
where he grew up.
I miss him a lot, there is no doubt about that, he
was one of the few people who I could really open up
to, and share my feelings and concerns with. There
are very few people who could listen and give advice
as he could. I just believe that
wherever he is he is happy and has no troubles
anymore. As said before, he is one of
the best friends I ever made in my life and that is
only a group of one other person. I am just glad
that know we can now read more about his work, which
previously he was always so reluctant to show. His
true talents have finally been released for all of
us to see, and for that I am once again grateful.
Dear
Nina, I hope that you are keeping well.... and if
you get some time please write back and keep me
informed........thanks again for the
page.....
yours
affectionately, Noel
Subject: Re: Webpage
My dear, Dear Noel;
How wonderful it was to hear from you!
I just can't say how much it means to me! I was
hoping all last winter that you would be coming back
to visit with us. I think it would have been good
for us both! Do you suppose you might do
it one day anyway? *smile* Eric
would VERY-much approve! *grin*
Thank you for your support of the page and
appreciation of the work I've put into it too.
It
is, as yet, only about 1/2 done - for there is much
to be published of Erics' work yet. Plus, I'm
also working on a real-life (non-cyber materials)
book as well. I hope that the FIREBIRD section was not too
difficult for you
(If indeed, you went into that section) - but I'm
sure that you, as I, know that Eric would feel that
something should
come of such a tragic and senseless loss in the
consequence of simple carelessness and
neglect. ~ It was the MOST difficult
part of the production to do! For I had
to do all the graphic work (which I am pretty
talented at dealing with) in making the best of the
pictures and their presentation to speak the message
primarily in picture form, bringing a message that
will not be soon forgotten by anyone who sees it, I
hope. I am looking into a future CD video-production
of the entire page when it is complete - for many,
many people do not connect to the internet - but
they could view it on their ordinary
computers. ~ L-A-T-E-R
though, much later.
I spent sometimes 12 to 15 hours per day,
(with all the interruptions for real-life
responsibilities in-between). When I hurt or am melancholy enough - I stay up all
night with it. But it is a kind of therapy that has something to
offer to others from it...
so that good comes of the bad that we cannot change
but must simple work our way through.
I
will be writing a lot more to you, Noel! And I
SOOoooo want
to hear all about YOU! And your brother, and mother
and all the family! In the tradition
established between Eric and you (as well as others
)- thought I'd mention that there is a movie that he
would have thought was *Totally Awesome*.... it's
called "Sling Blade"... Try to see it.
Great movie... incredibly written, filmed acted and
produced!!!
It's
about dinner time - will write to you again
tomorrow. *BTW* - may I post your e-mail on his page?
Noel
Burke just found out two weeks ago, that Eric was
killed, when he contacted the college to get our
phone number and address! He wrote me a most
beautiful and touching letter. I
hope to post it there in the next few
days... Please write soon, my
~other son~!
Love from, your GYPSY-mom..... (Nina)
From:
Raj Roy 106571.65@compuserve.com
Subject: Re: Webpage
Dear Nina,
Well, lovely to hear from you again.
It seems to some extent that your pain has been
comforted by
the words and feeling of others. The webpage has a
calm, peaceful atmosphere to it and although I was
overwhelmed with emotions
that I previously had suppressed, I knew it was good
to see what
others felt. Being able to share with others is the
best way to express yourself as well as find comfort
I think. Anyway, I was even more pleased
about the quick response. You will have to
excuse me taking a few days to answer to your
message, but at the end of the day I just seem to
have a few hours to eat dinner
and watch some tv. Thus, once the weekend comes I am
back on the comp. Well tomorrow is a public holiday
and that's why I am writing today.
Well in June I was able to find a position as a
trainee in a German
pharmaceuticals company an hour away form home.
After a six month period of waiting and numerous
unsuccessful applications, I finally got this
position, and I am enjoying every minute of it.
I
have a two year program after which I will have
integrated into the organization. My brother
transferred schools and is now at UNC, Chapel
Hill, it is a much bigger school, and it is
the first time he is alone, but he seems
to have adjusted and one of his best friends from
highschool goes to Duke, so he's not alone.
Ferrum unfortunately did not offer a good computer
major and
thus my brother felt he had to change.
My mother is
doing fine although was recently hard hit by the
death of her father. She still is suffering although
she has come to terms with the reality. Currently
her work as a kingarten teacher keeps her occupied
and of course that helps a lot too. Other than that
she doing fine and of course, also asked about how
you were doing, actually I think she will probably
write to you some time. It meant a
lot to her to meet you, Nina, and I am also glad,
that she met the mother of my best friend, and a
person who opened
her home to me during the breaks and treats me like
a "son". It was unfortunate, that I wasn't able to make it up
to you, Fall semester, but I hope to be coming to the States
next year
to visit my brother and I will then definitely make
it up to Woodstock. It means a lot
too me that you see me as your other
"son", Nina, and I am glad to have felt
your warmth and hospitality, being in a foreign land
wasn't easy for me but it was people like you and
Baker who offered me a home and a family to go to
that made me feel at home, and also gave my parents
the peace of mind that I was being taken care off.
Well, I hope to hear from you again Nina, please
also convey my greetings to Peach, and take care of
yourself.....
yours affectionately, Noel
Date: Thu, 2 Oct 1997 15:32:41 -0800
Subject: Re: Webpage
To: Raj Roy 106571.65@compuserve.com
Hello again, Noel; So good to hear from you and especially to hear that
you like what you are doing and where your life is
going! *smile*
I had asked about posting your ~tribute~ to Erics'
memory
in the section I am working on right now -
~Tributes~ May I? And if there are any special memories,
cute, interesting, unique, heartwarming...
whatever...
would you send them along and I will make a
composition by you? Did your injury from the accident leave any lasting
effects? *I hope not*.
In a bit of a rush today, will write more again...
but please do let me know about the tribute... would
you?
By the way... did you enjoy the section on Erics'
baptism? Perhaps you haven't done the entire page yet?
It IS
quite large -
over a hundred pages so far! And.... did you click on that ~DON'T CLICK HERE,
WHATEVER YOU DO~ section on the front page?
If so -
did
you enjoy the music and special effects? Did you
laugh? I
know that Eric would have LOVED it! *grin*
Your GYPSY-mom, (Nina)
==================================
Hello Noel....
I've been so concerned when I didn't hear from you!
Are you okay, son? Please write soon so I won't worry....
When I see you again - I have a very, very special
gift
which I am afraid to send in the mail... It has been
waiting for you since last year when you were going
to be coming down. I should have tried to get up
there to see you, Noel... but it is really hard for
me to face..... seeing that tree... going along that
road... you know - I'm sure. I often thought how terrible it must have been for
you to be there
and have to go past it again and again!
Tell
me more about your work! Your plans! Your life!
How are your parents - etc. etc.
Love from and hug from,
Your GYPSY-mom, (Nina)
Subject:
Where are U?
Dear Nina, I apologize my period of silence,
just been kinda of preoccupied the last few weeks.
Well have been in the finance section the last few
weeks, and although it was not one of my strong
subjects at school, I seem to be doing fine....
I am also fine. This is all a new experience,
especially as I m doing everything in another
language, given that I have lived in this country
for 12 yrs, there is still a difference between
everyday German and business German. Oh well
,gradually I am getting the hang of it, but it just
means I have to put in that little bit of extra
effort. On the other
hand, my fluency in English puts me at
an advantage.
So enough about me how are you? Your
messages always seem to full of joy and life, it's
always a pleasure to receive one. In terms of my `suprise',
sounds exciting, but really not necessary, there is
one special treasure that is on my shelf that Baker
gave me in Christmas '95, a rookie M. Jordan
baseball card....
that and my memories of him are more than enough!
But nevertheless, if everything works out and
I am in the US next year, we will be seeing
each other anyway. The family is fine, my mom
still wants to get around to writing to you, but
after the passing away of her father in Aug. she is
having a
difficult time. She's much better now, but due to
her previously only writing letters to her parents,
this is a painful reminder for her every time she
writes. Nevertheless, she always talks about the
strength she gained from your presence and what a
wonderful mother and person you are. I am glad that
you were able to meet, even though it was so brief.
Well, I am going to end here, but hope to hear from
you
and wish you well... take care...
yours affectionately, Noel :-)
Subject: Re: Where are U?
My Dear Noel: What a relief, dear
one.... I guess I felt some fear about the page
possibly bothering you! Especially since I did that
section on the Firebird. It was something that I
chose to do rather than pursue any kind of lawsuit.
I never have really understood the point of many of
the ~Wrongful Death~ suits and awards. I DID,
however, feel a pressing need to exhibit how a
simple act such as the failure of those people to
secure those leftover building materials which lay
(until that fateful night) in the rear of their
home, a hundred yards from where it blew into the
path of the Firebird that night...........for an
entire year.
The friend (owner of the storefront where we leased
our business location,) Bill Holtzman, paid $1,800
to a private investigation enterprise to have the
accident thoroughly reconstructed and all the
factors identified..... felt that I should turn the
report over to a legal agency. But Eric was the most precious and beloved part of
my life - and neither money or punitive action could restore
his life -
so I took it no further. I was very appreciative of
his gift to have the report done... for it felt good
to have Erics' integrity of character and driving
skills (of which he was deservedly
proud....)...proven beyond a doubt and laid out in a
very complete booklet which examined and reported it
all so well. It gave me a peace.... But when I didn't
hear from you - I'd feared that you had a problem
with it. I felt that the example and exhortation that now
stands in that section - would be appreciated and
approved of by Eric -
for perhaps there will be many other lives or
harmful events which may be avoided by that small pictorial tale being portrayed (with that intent)
- brings something of value out of an
otherwise senseless, unspeakably painful and tragic
waste. Even if only one other - then the effort and
emotional price of creating it - is
worthwhile. I am so glad that it did not
have a negative effect on you. I'd
felt that you would see the value and importance of
that section anyway. But if you did see it - I am
sure that it was a most difficult experience too.
The fact that you were safe and relatively unharmed
- speaks loudly of Gods' hand in taking Eric home
where their relationship could be at last restored
for eternity (which had been adversely effected by
mortal men - but Eric was sealed and belonged to God
- and there is much to be said of the mercy of Eric
being taken home to his Heavenly Father and out of a
world where he suffered much and in the near future
would have suffered even more pain and adversity in
the blindness that we `kind-of' knew was to
come....
Also.... There would have been no way that a spirit
as deep and sensitive as Erics' - could ever have
lived with the agony of what he would have felt if
he had survived and either you or Eric C. had been
killed!
In many ways - Eric was too ~Fine~ for this world
which he saw
stark and real and walked a stranger therein....
He died with a special kind of innocence which was
never torn from him by having to bend to compromises
that life would have pressed him severely to
resist! That is one of the good things I
see in his leaving so soon.
He was of such integrity and intellectual greatness
that the world would never- ever have been
comfortable for him! Thank you for the ~strokes~ ... they felt good...
and I too, am so glad that we are in contact with
each other. I don't know if you read what I put up from your
letter to him
in the Iron Blade - or the one to me shortly
afterward.... I hope that you approve - and that if
you are uncomfortable with it - you will let me
know. I would also like to publish that one I asked you
about when you viewed his page and wrote to me...
May I? There is a scripture by which I base my
reaching out to others in this time and
experience...
It is 2Corinthians 1: verse 3 &
4.....
Better close - time for dinner.
Oh... and the gift that I have for you is the one
thing that you requested and I had such attachment
for myself - I want you to have the Lone
Ranger. If I sent it in any
sort of shipping... there is the remote possibility
of its' being lost - and it could never be replaced
- and so I want to put it from my hands directly
into yours to be sure that you have
it. In going through his things -
I discovered that there was a second one among his
collection of action figures.
Having already given Jon the music - I wanted you to
have the Lone Ranger - for I felt that Eric would
like that too. Facing (November 11th) the
longest and most difficult of the series of
surgeries which I have had to undergo.. (this being
the last, I hope)... I made it known that if
anything should happen
to me - it is my desire that you have this - so it
IS yours.....
Until next mail - I remain... your ~other-mom~,
(Nina) and am sending hugs {{{{{{{Raj/Noel}}}}}}} and love
along too. *S*
Your GYPSY, (Nina)
Date: Sun, 9 Nov 1997 08:30:30 -0500
From: Raj Roy 106571.65@compuserve.com
Subject: Hi!
Dear Nina,
Well once again time has flown by and you're probably
wondering, why the delay, well this time it's due to
my computer. It had to go to the workshop.
I am
currently using the old one, but it needed a monitor
which I just recently bought, but I am back on-line
now.
I don't know what to say, about your gift, except
that I know how much you treasured it. I am glad you
found a second one, and I hope that is the one you
are keeping for me and not the original....... I
could not, especially knowing how precious it is to
you, accept it. The Lone Ranger
was the first thing that came to mind when you asked
me what I wanted, because I was so used to sitting
next to him in the backseat of ~the bird~. The fact
that it was there that day as well was what makes it
even more important to me. However, I
think it means more to you then me because
I do not know the history. I am more than grateful
for the pictures you sent me and the memories that I
have, and nothing for me is more precious than
these.
Actually, strangely enough, last summer here, (I
can't quite remember the situation ) I found a
Batman figure, and although it was not
Bakers', I felt... because of his love
for Batman I should keep it.......so I have that
figure........strange.... But Nina, I will accept
the SECOND Lone Ranger, and can't wait
to then see hopefully next year......
About my previous e-mails, yes you can post
what ever you think fit for your webpage, I
would actually feel honored to be on your page.
Well, I will end here, hoping that all is well with
you, and that you are keeping well. I am fine here,
although not looking forward to the winter. So
herewith , I remain, and hope to hear from you
soon.....
yours affectionately, Noel :-)
My dear, Dear Noel
Thank you for permission to share here.!!!
It is so very special (and somewhat rare!) when
people can/will communicate about their feelings
about a lost loved one they share! Often - (sad to
say, I have learned first-hand) it is too uncomfortable for most and that is so tragic and
painful, for that is like having your loved one die
over and over again.
It is such a joy to remember the good and cherish
all that they were and can remain being to you if
you keep them in your heart, minds, lives and
inter-relationships around you.
Surgery is Tuesday - so I will be a few days away
(in hospital) and don't know how soon I will be up
to using the computer (casts on both feet! - and
will be in bed a lot with them elevated due to the
subsequent swelling) ... But I have a laptop and will be on-line wherever I
am! *G*
Say hello to your mom for me! I have been praying
for her.
Sorry to be so brief tonight........
I love you, son........ (((((((RajRoy)))))))
Your GYPSY-Mom, (Nina)
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